This Gross Pig is Speaking Out

I am annoyed at people who worship law enforcement. I am annoyed at country music (even though I like it myself). I am annoyed at regimented teams that do nothing to benefit me in the long run, and that only distract me from school. I am annoyed at people who rally vehemently against things they have never experienced or attempted to understand. I am annoyed at people who follow blindly behind any Big Voice, never questioning the words tumbling from some figurehead's flapping lips. I am annoyed at anything that even remotely reminds me of two years spent fooling myself, spent with my head submerged below water, spent with the wool pulled over my eyes. I am annoyed at myself for allowing someone to silence me, for keeping my eyes shut against the gross unhappiness I was harboring. I am annoyed that I didn't come to my senses sooner, that I began to think of myself the same way he thought of me: a gross pig. I am annoyed that two years are gone.

It is stupid to be annoyed when everything has turned around, when I have found someone who loves me for who I am, instead of trying to change me at every turn. But sometimes, when I see other people suffering, with the same willed ignorance and blindness that I once showed, I just get so bitter.

If most--or even any--of the words coming out of your supposed love's mouth are degrading, hostile, mean, sarcastic, undermining, condescending, or mocking of you, wake up and get out of that relationship. Find someone who actually loves you and who wants to be with you. For the love of God, love yourself enough to recognize how hurtful jesting comments can be. Love yourself enough to see the truth, and to find someone that wouldn't change a hair on your head. Find someone who brings out the best in you, and you the best in him/her. Otherwise, it's just a waste of time, and a series of hard life lessons learned.